In a world full of unimaginable absurdity, we spend a lot of time thinking about the future… and to where all of this insanity leads.
“Future Headline Friday” is our satirical take of where the world is going if it remains on its current path. While our satire may be humorous and exaggerated, rest assured that everything we write is based on actual events, news stories, personalities, and pending legislation.
November 10, 2029: A Big Mac in California now costs $45. Lawmakers Plan Another Minimum Wage Hike
Members of the California State Legislature expressed anger this week after fast food chain McDonald’s hiked prices of its signature Big Mac to $45 per sandwich at locations across the state. In other states like Texas and Florida, however, Big Mac prices are below $15.
“This is capitalist greed, pure and simple,” State Senator Justin Flate said, “And we won’t stand for it.”
Flate, of course, was the state lawmaker who spearheaded the 2026 law that raised minimum wage to $40 per hour, as well as last year’s bill which raised minimum wage to $50 per hour.
Flate stated this morning that he will respond to McDonald’s price hike by sponsoring a new bill which raises the minimum wage to $60 per hour, which is 3x higher than the rest of the country.
“There’s a clear pattern here,” Senator Flate said. “Every time we raise the minimum wage, McDonald’s and other businesses raise their prices. This is a greedy, intentional action on their part to snub our efforts to control the...
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