Tetra/Getty, Valeri Potapova/Shutterstock, Santi Nuñez, Studio Marmellata, Valentina Barreto/Stocksy
In January 2020, a Menlo Park mother’s nearly 2,000-word ad seeking a “household manager/cook/nanny” went viral. Among the laundry list of requirements were that the nanny would “ski on an intermediate level,” “research the latest developments in food science,” have “experience driving in other countries,” “do calisthenics,” and “correctly quantify how much fish to purchase for five people.” “Is this the most demanding ad for a nanny ever?” the Guardian asked. Jezebel suggested that the mother behind the ad seemed to be seeking a “chef, accountant, travel agent, math teacher, and personal trainer, like the iPhone of people.”
There are many differences between the writer of that ad and the average parent seeking child care arrangements. (Most parents don’t have a “pool cottage” for their nanny to live in, for one.) But one difference that struck me when I read it was the ad writer's clarity about her role: she was an employer. An exacting (and perhaps terrifying) manager of her “household staff.”
For most parents, it goes more like this: A child shows up in your house. If you ever want to go anywhere (like to your job) again, you need child care. All the options are hideously expensive and/or don’t provide the needed time coverage. And then... you figure out the least-bad option, usually without thinking much about the structural forces that have created this impossible...
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